Two situations happened in the course of a couple days apart. Below is the recap of what happened to me on Wednesday and last night.
The Original Blog Post called, Ignorance Is Bliss, composed Wednesday, February 15, 2012…
Ignorance Is Bliss
Often, people are judged based on their appearance, religion, or orientation.
As an adult, I’ve already been faced with discrimination because of my weight.
When I was younger, my grandmother used to say, “Estelle, if people call you fat, you simply reply, I know… I have a mirror. ” Being a young girl, I was too afraid to speak up. A part of me wanted to yell and shout, but another part of me didn’t want the drama. I just wanted to be left alone.
Now, when I was teased for being overweight as a child, it hurt. Let’s face it though, kids are kids. At one point or another, children are going to tease and are going to be teased…at least that’s the mentality I have developed overtime.
However, it hurts more as an adult. I want to think that as an adult, teasing and bullying wouldn’t exist anymore for me. Then comes the occasional smirk from a younger kid or an teen. It’s situations such as those that prevented me from dressing the way I wanted. I didn’t want to be stared at or laughed at. Let’s just be real, I felt ugly and I felt that I wasn’t pretty. Why even bother wearing certain clothes if I wasn’t meant to wear it. With that, I let random strangers whom I didn’t know intimidate me- and that in itself is sad.
As I am writing this blog, it is 9:13 AM. There is a random older female staring at me. She is the reason I am writing this blog.
Often on public transportation, we are faced with homeless people who harass others for money, others who smell like an onion field, and those who are just plain mean, to name a few. This morning, a seat became available on the train. I knew there was space for me on the train. However, when there are two “men” who do not want to close their legs and a woman who looks so bitchy and nasty, sitting down may be a problem. I guess you know where I am going with this… I thanked the “man” next to me for moving over and I was greeted with curse words from both this person and the woman. I continued to listen to my i-pod. I’m not going to lie, I was hurt. But I felt that if I had gotten up, I would have let them win. I will not let people, let alone strangers continue to hurt my feelings and take my energy.
In fact, I should thank these people for giving me experiences I can learn from and share with the world.
—Now this was Wednesday’s blog… check out my addition!
Last night, I didn’t know whether to laugh or curse…
I was walking with my mom, sister, cousin, and boyfriend after visiting my grandmother to look for a cab. My mom quickly spotted a cab and wanted to go inside. However, I didn’t wanted to walk with my boyfriend. My cousin graciously offered to walk with him to the train station. So I went in the cab with my mom and sis.
The cab driver looked very annoyed. I can understand why he looked annoyed- he wasn’t sure if he was going to get a fare. The cab driver turned around and looked at my mom and strongly said, “Is it because I am not Dominican that you didn’t want to go in my cab?” Honestly, I knew that this was the beginning of something bad, because my mom looked at him as if she were going to punch him in the face. Her face said it all. I knew the daggers were on!
However, my mom isn’t one to let people absorb her energy… My mom just simply said, “What does being Dominican have to do with anything. I am not Dominican. My address is…” The cab driver then says, “I know how YOU Dominicans are!” Again, my mom says, “My address is…” The rest of the 15 minutes were in that cab were left in utter silence. My response to the situation was to meerly write on Facebook, “Shit.Just.Got.Real.” I didn’t know what else to say.
When the cab stopped in front of my apartment building, the cab driver kept instigating saying, “I know how YOU Dominicans are!” I give my mother credit for not yelling at the cab driver. All I did was laugh at what he was saying. That’s the only reaction I have.
I dedicate this blog to my cousin Tuti who unexpectedly passed away this afternoon at the age of 31. This serves as the message that tomorrow isn’t promised to anyone. As a family, we must be united, despite the good moments and bad moments. I love you guys!