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Hello Everyone!

I hope the summer has been kind to all of you as it has been to me. This summer has been great for the most part; I have spent time with my friends, family, and boyfriend. In fact, my boyfriend and I celebrated our 3rd year anniversary by taking a mini-vacation to Atlantic City and also by seeing Aladdin on Broadway.

I made a list of goals to achieve by the end of the summer. Although I may not achieve all of the goals by the end of the summer, there is a greater lesson that I am learning. This lesson is to let go and just live. I took some time and reflected; honestly, I knew that things had to change. I sat back and thought to myself, “What am I doing?” I knew that I could do much better in many aspects. The problem with this thought and reflection is that by putting myself through this unnecessary guilt, I am not living. I am literally sitting there, wondering what I could have done, instead of bettering myself in the process.

I read a quote on Instagram that really spoke to me, “I stopped looking for the light. I decided to become it instead.” To me, the quote means I stopped looking for a way out, a solution to the problem. The solution to my life’s issues lies within myself. And I am determined to succeed and prosper.

Summer 2014 has a deeper meaning for me for another reason. August 8th marked the 20th anniversary of my grandfather’s passing. There isn’t a day where I don’t think about him. My grandfather was truly a gem in my world, a symbol of fatherly love at its finest. When he passed away, I felt a part of myself die as well, even at seven years old. Overtime, I grew not to trust many people, out of fear that they would leave. Would someone leave just because I trusted them, or would they leave because they didn’t like me; these were some of the questions I asked myself on a constant basis.

However, it was not until I met my boyfriend that I grew to love and trust. And I thank him everyday for coming into my life and helping me become a better person.

I made a goal to live- I want to do things that I have never done before, that both excite me and scare me. And this is exactly what I have been doing. When Tyrone and I went to Atlantic City, there was a sense of tranquility and happiness that I had never possessed up until that moment. Going to Coney Island, being with my friends, spending more time with my loved ones… this is what living is about.

Now we are in August- this is known as the Sunday of summer. I want to spend the rest of my summer doing what I love to do most- writing and being with my loved ones, exploring new and exciting places in New York City.

I hope that you all are doing what makes you happiest. We all deserve the chance to be happy and to smile.

Thank you for your support and for reading.

Until next time!

I’m watching the Real Housewives of Atlanta Reunion Part II encore as we speak. I’ve been preparing for this week’s blog, thinking what to blog about this week.

The altercation between Porsha Williams & Kenya Moore was messed up… let’s be real. It was messed up for Kenya Moore to be pushed to the ground, hair pulled in front of millions of people so to speak. But honestly, I felt even more for Porsha. She said it herself, “I’ve embarrassed myself! I let her get to me!” In fact Porsha was right, she let Kenya get to her, and in the worst way.

What happened between Porsha & Kenya happens to us in our everyday lives… how you may ask?

Ever had that one person, that “villain” who always gets under your skin? That one person who will antagonize you and instigate an argument like no other. This person can be a co-worker, boss, or even a family member. Unfortunately, I’ve had all three people serve as villains. I’ve had that “limit” that “breaking point” where things got so intense, I’ve ran away in tears; I could not help it. It was either I run away and hide in tears, or I smack someone. Personally, I’d rather run away from the situation at that moment than smack someone in the face and regret it, but also deal with the consequences.

I cannot imagine what was going on in Porsha’s mind. All the things she has been going through: her divorce, things people say online, and someone antagonizing her… of course she exploded! I believe it when she told Bravo Host Andy Cohen that she “just blacked out.” Yes when someone is that angry, that happens; I’ve been there! I feel that Porsha had no time to cool down, to “run away” from the situation and that’s why she exploded.

I was thinking of what I’ve been through, of the situations that my loved ones have been through, and I’ve thought of ways that maybe situations like those could be prevented in the future:

Talk To Someone: When things get rocky for me, I talk to people who I trust. I speak to my grandmother and my mother and ask them for advice. Even if I may not like what they say, it feels good just to vent. I know my mother and grandmother have lots of life experiences and I trust their opinions. I also speak to my best friends and my boyfriend because I know they have my back and they always provide a fresh prospective.
Social Media Filter: I’m guilty of this, but venting on social media isn’t always the best thing, especially when the person who you are feeling a certain way is following you on facebook, twitter, instagram, etc. Try very hard not to compose posts directed at them. If there are people whose posts are bothering you that badly, facebook has the “unfollow” option which I will tell you, saved me from being utterly annoyed tonight.
Talking It Out: If you feel that you have to talk it out, then maybe you should confront that person. I believe that one prospers more with sugar than with vinegar. Approach the person… go get a cup of coffee, not liquor as it could cause things to further escalate. Be forthright and convey to the person why you are feeling this way and how the situation could be fixed. If the relationship cannot be salvaged, then there’s definitely that option of not having to be around each other or if it’s a family matter, agree to be cordial and move on.
Block &/Or Unfriend: Sometimes, blocking and unfriending is the best option. There are those who we can’t be friends with and we’re probably not meant to be friends with. My mother tells me all the time… not everything nor everyone is important. Being an outgoing person, that’s a hard adage to follow. I always want to talk to people and be friends with them. But also I had to realize who is really my friend and who will really have my back. Unfortunately, I’m not friends with some people anymore, but it’s best that way. I’ve found that by not speaking with certain people, I’m definitely less stressed out. I don’t need to unnecessary stress in my life.

I’d like to think that we are all the protagonists whose lives serve as the plot of our story. It is up to us to determine which characters will be in our plots and also their degree of importance. What’s most important is that we learn from our mistakes and from those around us. It’s those life decisions that serve as lessons.

Until next week!